The Worst Riders

I’ve been driving limos for 20 years and I’ve seen it all. From people having intimate relations in the back to people arguing to drunks puking their guts out, pretty much everything you can think of has happened in the back of my limo. Here are a couple of qualities that sum up the worst riders: 

  • Obviously, the overly drunk people. These are people I might pick up after a boxing match or a game. They are very drunk and can’t tell me where they are going. At least with bachelor parties, I knew the route ahead of time. But when people can’t give me clear directions, it gets very frustrating.  
  • The people who want to make several stops. I don’t mind stopping at one or two other places, but when they want me to go from one end of town to the other so they can pick up another person or just say hey to some girl they are seeing, I draw the line.  
  • People who want me to transport items. My limo is not a cab nor a u-haul, so I am not going to move your couch from one place to the next. There are cheaper ways to do that than limos. One time, a guy had bought a huge roll of toilet paper and wanted me to take it to his house. I am not a delivery service, and I told him that as much. He wanted to use the limo to impress his friends, so I told him to buy them all beer instead.  
  • Passengers who are racist, misogynistic, homophobic or bigots. Your business is your business, but the second you start talking hate speech and demoralizing an entire class of people, then we have a problem. It’s my limo, and I don’t have to let you be in it.  

Most customers are pretty great, but you always have those few that make you rethink this decision to drive. But then I have a great passenger, and I am ready for more!